I’ll reiterate for those who missed it, Ringu is a retarded movie. It’s a Japanese movie. They used the plot to make the American horror movie, “The Ring.” I was going to rent The Ring because I’m planning on making a parody of the movie, but they were all out. So, I found Ringu instead.

Big mistake. I’m normally not one for horror movies; in fact, I have a history of falling asleep during them. However, this one was so stupid that I had constantly scoff at its stupidity. I ended up turning it off and didn’t finish the movie.

In the beginning, this girl is supposed to die. The way they do it is dumb. All of a sudden, there’s a negative of the black and white shot of the girl’s face. That’s supposed to be scary? Later on, they have these photos of kids and all their faces are distorted. In my mind, I’m thinking, “Photoshop, blur.” I guess it might be freaky to some people, but not to me.

There’s this cabin that she visits… in the middle of the daytime! And there are kids playing all around! And there are other cabins next to it! Freaky.

Finally the plot plods along to where it’s suddenly night-time and she watches this video. She somehow magically figures out which one it is on a shelf of a whole bunch of videos. (It’s the only one that’s slanted.) And check this out, it’s unlabeled! Scary! She takes it back and watches it. All these semi-weird symbols, etc. Nothing particularly bloody or scary. Yet, when it’s over, she gasps as if watching the video drained all this energy from her. Oh, puh-leaze. Maybe it’s some sort of Japanese thing. Watching Japanese text move around may be scary to them, but when I think of moving text, I think Power Point.

At this point, I turn it off. What a waste of money. Some people claim that the Japanese version is scarier. I haven’t seen The Ring yet, but I’m 100% sure that it can’t be this dumb. Those people need their heads checked.