Exclusive Sneak-Peak Script for New Hummer Commercial

Man walks into restroom. Goes to urinal, between two other men. He takes a peak at one man, then the next.

Tough music starts.

Man goes to Hummer dealership, buys Hummer, drives off.

Compensate for your shortcomings. Buy a Hummer.

If you’ve seen the latest Hummer commercials, this makes more sense. There’s one where this guy is buying tofu and then sees the guy behind him buying red meat. So, he goes and buys a Hummer.

I wish I could film it, or turn it into a one-panel Chalkboard Manifesto.