I’m about to start working, so lately I’ve been frightened about the prospect of people finding me on the internets. Luckily, I share the name of some Christian singer guy, but this weblog still shows up on the second page when you google my name. I don’t want to watch what I say on this weblog; I don’t want to manage my image at this young an age. I want to be as crass as I fucking want on The Chalkboard Manifesto — and I reserve the right to be offensive to anyone.
This could also be a problem if I decide to become a public figure of some sort. One cannot help but be a moron at 20 years old, and I do not want those moronic things preserved on the internets for all to see. A simple slip of judgment can be a disaster.
Things I have said can be easily taken out of context, especially when that context can sometimes be my entire life (or my personal growth during my teenage years.) I believe that people are smart enough to recognize context, but they have to be given that context in the first place. I won’t be able to defend myself.
Of course, certain public persons have recovered from much worse than I can ever do, but I do not have the skills to attempt such a recovery.
So maybe it’s best if I become anonymous, so I can do what I want to do. Alternatively, I can make this weblog private, but that doesn’t solve the Chalkboard Manifesto problem. Furthermore, there’s still the risk that information will leak out even from a private weblog. Writing under pseudonym will not sate my vanity, but that may be the price of freedom.
I’m undecided whether I should really go anonymous, but I’m certainly leaning in that direction. While it may be a tragedy to possibly erase this weblog from existence, I will at least keep records for myself.